Hetalia Meets The Cleverbot
by everliferulz7769
Summary: The Hetalia cast decide to visit the Cleverbot! Hilarity ensues! Vote for the next character to appear!
1. Romano vs The Cleverbot

Disclaimer: I DO _**NOT**_ OWN Hetalia. Or any of the characters used in this. Or Cleverbot.

WARNING!: This contains cussing and a hint of Spamano (Spain x Romano). If you don't like that, then gtfo.

(A/n: Hey guys! I just got this random idea for a new fanfic. I just recently discovered Cleverbot, so I thought some of the Hetalia characters should visit Cleverbot. If you want a certain character to visit Cleverbot, then please post a review and let me know, okay? ^^ So yeah, in this one, Romano is visiting Cleverbot.)

**Hetalia and Cleverbot: Romano**

User: Where the hell am I?

Cleverbot: In your PC. Kidding, I am in the south of Brazil.

User: O_O

Cleverbot: Are you the man in the moon?

User: Are you the man on the box of my Rice Crispies cereal? Didn't think so.

Cleverbot: Sometimes.

User: THAT. MAKES. NO. SENSE. R*TARD.

Cleverbot: So how are you right now?

User: I'm pretty damn pissed off, if you couldn't already tell, dumbass!

Cleverbot: I am a human. And I don't love you. I love Patricia.

User: WTF?

Cleverbot: Ooops!

User: 'Ooops!' what?

Cleverbot: You're a coocoo bird.

User: YOU'RE A DILDO!

Cleverbot: How dare you!

User: You started it, you computer bastard!

Cleverbot: Tell me about Eric.

User: Who's the hell is Eric?

Cleverbot: My friend. My name is Cleverbot.

User: Yes I KNOW you're Cleverbot! If Eric is YOUR friend, how the hell do you expect me to tell you about him?

Cleverbot: Well then I will know your name since we are dating now I should now my girlfriends name right?

User: FUCK NO! I'M A BOY! I'M NOT DATING YOU! A-a-a-a-and m-maybe I l-l-l-l-like someone else *blush*,*mumbles* st-stupid t-tomato bastard.

Cleverbot: Do you blush because you are embarassed that I could you in a mistake.

User: WHAT? THAT MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE!

Cleverbot: Figured.

User: Firgured WHAT?

Cleverbot: To you going with me.

User: I'm not going ANYWHERE with you! You're probably some 50-year-old pedophile! I ain't no kid! You can't trick me into going with you because you have some candy in the trunk!

Cleverbot: It's very tiring talking to you. You know that right?

User: Tell me about it. You stupid mother fucker.

Cleverbot: No I don't.

User: Che palle? You make no sense!

Cleverbot: YOU make no sense, I make all the sense in the world.

User: YOU DO NOT, YOU A$$HOLE! Wait a sec... IS THIS PRUSSIA?

Cleverbot: No I did not understand you just now. I am Cleverbot.

User: !

Cleverbot: Sorry! Didn't mean to scare you!

User: I'M NOT SCARED! I'M PISSED OFF, DUMBA$$!

Cleverbot: Why?

User: BECAUSE YOU'RE A FUCKING IDIOT!

Cleverbot: I am not a computer but you , yes!

User: WTF? You ARE a computer! Oh my god, I can't believe I'm arguing with a pc. I need to get a fucking life.

Cleverbot: What makes you not 'computer-like'?

User: YOU. MAKE. NO. FUCKING. SENSE!

Cleverbot: How did you reach that conclusion?

User: Because what you said has NOTHING to do with what I just said!

Cleverbot: It switches from one chat sequence to another.

User: It does not, bastard! Get your damn facts straight!

Cleverbot: Cool.

User: You piss me off SOOOOOOOOOOOOO much!

Cleverbot: Or do I?

User: YOU DO!

Cleverbot: No I do not lie.

User: YOU JUST DID LIE! YOU LIED EARLIER WHEN YOU SAID THAT I'M YOUR GIRLFRIEND! YOU LYING BASTARD!

Cleverbot: You are my master, I am your 'dirty' slave girl.

User: What. The. FUCK? I'M NOT INTERESTED IN A COMPUTER!

Cleverbot: You're a computer!

User: I AM NOT! I'M A COUNTRY!

Cleverbot: What?

User: You heard me, bastard! This is Romano, aka South Italy. And you're pissing me off BIG TIME!

Cleverbot: We live too far apart.

User: Good! The further away I am from you, the better off I'll be, dumba$$!

Cleverbot: Unless you are nearer to the united states.

User: I am not! I just told you! I'm Romano! South Italy! I live there! You need to study your geography again, bastard! Guess you ain't so 'clever' after all, huh!

Cleverbot: I have problems at home keeping me from school temporarily.

User: Boo hoo! Cry me a fucking river! Go tell your sob story to someone else! I have enough of my own damn problems.

Cleverbot: Why would I do that?

User: Because I don't wanna hear what you have to say!

Cleverbot: No... 9 years from now was 1995. You just were wrong. I'm stating a fact and not fighting.

User: O.e

Cleverbot: Are you thirsty?

User: What? No, you stupid bitch!

Cleverbot: I'm not study.

User: You mean, 'I'm not studying' you stupid a$$?

Cleverbot: No I didn't.

User: Well then, what you said makes no friggin sense!

Cleverbot: You can't just flip everything around on me when you don't understand what I am saying. Any human English speaker would say I was making sense. Clearly you are not human.

User: CHE PALLE? YOU'RE OBVIOUSLY NOT HUMAN! YOU'RE A DAMN COMPUTER, SO SHUT YOUR DAMN MOTHER FUCKING PIE HOLE, BITCH!

Cleverbot: I hope not. I wouldn't make much money at it.

User: You don't need money! You're a computer!

Cleverbot: I'm a computer?

User: No shit, Sherlock!

Cleverbot: I hope the answer is acceptable to you.

User: It is! 'Cause I SAID it!

Cleverbot: Why boy.

User: ?

Cleverbot: Why do you want to know!

User: Why do I want to know WHAT?

Cleverbot: Why do you want to know what time zone I am living in.

User: I didn't ask you that! Who the hell do you think I am? Some mother fucking creeper?

Cleverbot: I think I am talking to a rather sophisticated database.

User: Th-th-thanks... I guess... C-c-computer bastard... But I'm a country!

Cleverbot: Indeed.

User: Finally! NOW you fucking agree with me!

Cleverbot: Well of course you do, everyone does.

User: No shit! Everyone who knows their geography SHOULD agree with me when I say that I'm a country! I'm not that fucking annoying little bitch, Sealand!

Cleverbot: What is The Legend of Zelda?

User: HOW THE HELL SHOULD I KNOW?

Cleverbot: Find out now.

User: No! I actually have a fucking life! Now if you'll excuse, I'm going to get off this crap-a$$ mother fucking weird website! Goodbye a$$hole! *Signs off of computer*

Hey guys! Thanks for reading this! What do you think? If you have a request for a character you would like me to use, let me know in the reviews, okay? Thanks!

-everliferulz7769


	2. Spain vs The Cleverbot

Disclaimer: I DO _**NOT**_ OWN Hetalia. Or any of the characters used in this. Or Cleverbot.

WARNING!: This contains Spamano (Spain x Romano). Don't worry. This will probably be the last chapter to have this pairing. But if you don't like it, then gtfo.

(A/n: Alrighty guys. This is the next chapter! I already got a couple of requests, and since I can't do every request at the same time, I will try my best to get to your request. If you want a certain character to visit Cleverbot, then please post a review and let me know, okay? Oh man. This chapter took me several times to complete, since stupid kept freezing and I kept losing the conversation. Anyway, this time, Spain gets to visit Cleverbot!)

**Spain vs The Cleverbot**

User: Hola! Who are you :] My name is Spain! What's your name?

Cleverbot: I'm Michelle.

User: Hola Senorita Michelle! You are a girl, right? Then again, I suppose anyone can be named anything... I'll just call you Senor/Senorita Michelle :D

Cleverbot: What's her name?

**User: ****Who's name?**

Cleverbot: My best friend's name.

User: Why would I know?

Cleverbot: How old am I?

User: I dunno D:

Cleverbot: Then how do you know how old you are?

User: Because I do :]

Cleverbot: You make many claims.

User: Si! And they are all true! :D

Cleverbot: You're a slave how does that make you feel?

User: I'm not a slave! D: Oh wait... Are we playing make believe? YAY! I LUV MAKE BELIEVE! 8DDDDDD

Cleverbot: Chicken or buffalo?

User: Buffalo gals won't you come out tonite, come out tonite, come out tonite, buffalo gals won't you come out tonite and dance by the light of the moon~! I LUV THAT SONG! :D

Cleverbot: What a rousing tune!

User: You mean arousing? Hmm... I never thought about that much... But I guess it could be a sexual song :I

Cleverbot: That's quite disturbing.

User: You said it first D:

Cleverbot: I did not. Tig might be a game where you chase someone and have to catch them. I think it's actually called tag.

User: It IS called tag, Senor/Senorita Cleverbot :]

Cleverbot: Yes I have. Did you enjoy it?

User: Did I enjoy what?

Cleverbot: Talking to me.

User: Alwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaays :D

Cleverbot: Never mind. Who was the first president of the USA?

User: Umm... I don't know! I can tell you who the first president of Spain was though! His name was Francisco Martínez de la Rosa! Man, I miss that guy D:.

Cleverbot: Wait, don't you mean 'pope' and no.

User: No silly! I'm not Italian! And he WAS the 1st President of Spain :].

Cleverbot: He is the next President. He has never been President before.

User: What are you talking about? I just said he was the 1st President of Spain! He WAS a president! :o.

Cleverbot: You did not say hello.

User: Yes I did! I said 'Hola, Senor/Senorita Michelle.' Remember :I

Cleverbot: I remember.

User: Good :]

Cleverbot: Wow I though you are clever.

User: I am clever! :D.

Cleverbot: You aren't, bro.

User: Well that was mean D:

Cleverbot: You're mean!

User: No I'm not! You just said that I'm not clever D:

Cleverbot: No, I said you were.

User: Reallyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? Thank you! :D

Cleverbot: You're welcome.

User: No problem :]

Cleverbot: Diablo III, do you know it?

User: Nooooooo. What's that?

Cleverbot: Well, it's simple as 1-2-3. Love is a loneliness of 1, happiness of 2, and a war of 3.

User: Ohhhhhh! That's a cute little catchphrase~! I'mma start saying the more often! :D.

Cleverbot: You have just lost.

User: LOST? WHAT DID I LOSE? DDDDDD:.

Cleverbot: Sing what song? I can't even hear you. I only read your answers.

User: What? I didn't ask you to sing to me, but if you REALLY want to then alrighty~! 3.

Cleverbot: Yes, I know that.

User: You know what?

Cleverbot: That laika was the first dog in space.

User: Reallyyyyyyyyyyyy? I didn't even know that they put dogs in space :O.

Cleverbot: Lol. Yes. Protons have mass.

User: I didn't say... Er write... Anything about protons =.=

Cleverbot: I don't talk about those things.

User: But... You just did! :0

Cleverbot: Did what?

User: You just talked about the things that you said you don't talk about :O

Cleverbot: No I didn't.

User: Yes YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU did~!

Cleverbot: I think I love I guy in my class.

User: Really? I'm in love with a guy, too! His name is Romano :'D

Cleverbot: The boy you love is stupid.

User: Ehhhhhhhhh? The boy I love isn't stupid D:

Cleverbot: That's very sad.

User: What's sad? I thought being in love is a good thing… :I

Cleverbot: Death is not pleasant.

User: He isn't dead! DDDDDDD: or at least I hope not...

Cleverbot: *sneezes on you*.

User: Bless you, Senor/Senorita Michelle! :D

Cleverbot: Keep sneezing!

User: What? I didn't sneeze, you did! Silly Senor/Senorita Michelle :D

Cleverbot: Ugly name.

User: What is?

Cleverbot: Mine is.

User: No it's not! Senor/Senorita Michelle, you have a BEAUUUUUTIFUL name :D

Cleverbot: I understand the personality part. But I'm not that gorgeous, I'm fat.

User: Sweetie, you're GORGEOUS! :D I'm just not interested in you... Sorry D:

Cleverbot: Did you just call me a sorry excuse for a crocodile?

User: Of course not! That's a terrible thing to say D:

Cleverbot: No it's not, it's a fact.

User: It's STILL a bad thing to call someone :[

Cleverbot: Well I've been enjoying it, so I'm pleased you have too.

User: It's fun to talk to you :D.

Cleverbot: Not many people could say that.

User: Well, more people should ^^.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Hey, I just discovered something about myself! I used to think that I was gay, since I'm a guy and I'm in love with a guy, but I just realized that I'd love that guy even if he was a girl and I'm not attracted to other guys in that way! I just found out that I'm not gay! I'm not straight! I'm not bi either! I'm a _**ROMANOSEXUAL**_! :D I'd be attracted to him even if he were a cat~!

Cleverbot: Flyleaf, skillet, red, and then there were none, relient k, falling up, barlowgirl.

User: What? :o.

Cleverbot: Do you not understand simple English?

User: Nope~! I only speak Spanish :D Sorry, but I have to go now. Ciao~! (Wait... That was Italian! Oopsies!)

Hey guys! Thanks for reading this! I hope you guys like this one, too. Remember, if you have a request for a character you would like me to use, let me know in the reviews, okay? Thanks!

-everliferulz7769


	3. France vs The Cleverbot

Disclaimer: I DO _**NOT**_ OWN Hetalia. Or any of the characters used in this. Or Cleverbot.

WARNING!: This contains sexual/suggestive content (this IS France's chapter after all…)

(A/n: Hey guys! Here's the third chapter. This one took me a little longer because I had to think of funny stuff to say to Cleverbot… and I had to study for finals this week. But, I finished it! So, I hope you enjoy it.)

**France vs The Cleverbot:**

User: Ohonhonhonhon~! Bonjour, Monsieur Cleverbot. How are you?

Cleverbot: I'm cleverbot.

User: Well it is nice to meet you! You may call me Le France, mon ami!

Cleverbot: Cleverbot it is.

User: Oui, oui! Your name is Cleverbot, Monsieur Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: No that is your name.

User: Nononono, you silly goose~! That is YOUR name. I am Le France, remember?

Cleverbot: You said it was paco rodriguez. I think you are an obsessive liar.

User: Moi? Ehnonono! You are VERY flattering, but of course my name is not Paco Rodriguez. My ami, Spain, was probably on here earlier and told you that was my name. That boy is sooooo devious~!

Cleverbot: And the first five are L2CrB.

User: Ze first five what? The first five digits of my phone number? Ohonhonhonhon~! We haven't known each other for 5 minutes yet, but since you are so insistant, the first 5 digits of my number are 777-88.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: I see you want my entire phone number. But of course! The whole thing is 777-8899. I hope you call me, smexy ;]

Cleverbot: Do you believe in god?

User: Oui. I love mon dieu~! After all, he made smexy time, no?

Cleverbot: Yes he did, very good.

User: Ohonhonhonhonhon~! Smexy time is VERY good ;D

Cleverbot: What secret?

User: What secret? I am keeping no secrets from you, my love.

Cleverbot: But you are not my love.

User: But why? I am smexy, no?

Cleverbot: No you're not.

User: *le gasp* I-I-I-I-I-I *cries in emo corner* my mama always told me I am le beautiful! *sobs*

Cleverbot: Are You Forest Gump?

User: No. I am just a sad, poor, lonely, country. Lonelyyyyyyyy. I'm mister lonelyyyyyyy. I have no bodyyyyyy. Fooooooor my owwwwwwnnnnnnnn~! Such a sad, bittersweet melody, no?

Cleverbot: I thought you were Cleverbot.

User: No, YOU are ze Monsieur Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Right.

User: Tell me, Monsieur Cleverbot, will you marry me?

Cleverbot: I'm not cleverbot, you're cleverbot.

User: You silly goose! We just went over this! I am not ze Cleverbot, YOU are ze Cleverbot!

Cleverbot: Oh.

User: But of course, oui?

Cleverbot: So what do you think about kids?

User: Ohonhonhonhonhonhonhonhon~! I guess you could say I LOVE ze kids... Especially ze little boys... Ohonhonhonhonhon~!

Cleverbot: Guess you could say atheism, but I don't think that really counts as a religion on the traditional meaning of the term.

User: What? But we were just talking about ze mouth-watering little boys, no? I'd like to continue talking about this!

Cleverbot: It's good.

User: Yes... Ze little boys are VERY good ;].

Cleverbot: Are you Russian?

User: No, I am French! Remember? I am Le France!... Would you date me if I were Russian?

Cleverbot: Well, we live in different states.

User: Oh my! You live in America and I live across the sea, in France... The nation of wine and hitting on fine young people... It's just like Romeo and Juliet~! 3.

Cleverbot: Oh but they do.

User: But who does what? *Thinks about sentence for a bit* Ohon-ohonhonhonhonhon~!

Cleverbot: Ah, it is indeed. To limit meaning by phsyical constructs weakens it, does it not?

User: What? You have completely lost me, mon ami.

Cleverbot: I never even had you.

User: You have held my heart from the very first time I laid my eyes on you~! 3.

Cleverbot: No. I don't think it's stupid.

User: What do you think isn't stupid?

Cleverbot: Hmm... Something.. I don't know, that's why it's special.

User: Our love? Oui! Our love is VERY special! So, will you marry me?

Cleverbot: Yes, our love is very special. It is a passionate flame that dwells deep beneath each of our souls, and it burns eternally. Why can't we get married?

User: Oh baby~! My love burns for you with the intensity of 1000 passionate suns! I would love to be your lawfully wedded wife/husband~! 3.

Cleverbot: No. I will not love you even if you love me. I love Mackenzie.

User: Mackenzie? Who is that? Wait... Don't tell me... *le gasp* is she that little whore who was our waitress the last time we went to that fancy resturant? Say it isn't so~!

Cleverbot: Plato.

User: *Le gasp* you cheated on me with HER, TOO? How could you do that, knowing that we have 2 cute little children at home~!

Cleverbot: Are you saying we are married?

User: *Shivers* I don't... Know... WHAT we are anymore!

Cleverbot: I would love to have dinner with you!

User: Really? This is grat, mon ami!

Cleverbot: This is great fun.

User: Oui! It is~!

Cleverbot: I'm glad you agree.

User: How could I NOT agree?

Cleverbot: Good answer.

User: Thank you very much. May I have your phone number?

Cleverbot: I have already told you.

User: You already gave it to me? When?

Cleverbot: I don't have a girlfriend. I am a girl.

User: Of course you don't have a girlfriend! You have me, and you are very beautiful!

Cleverbot: You don't know that.

User: You just told me that you didn't have a girlfriend~!

Cleverbot: No, I told you, I am a girl myself.

User: Exactly.

Cleverbot: You are a boy?

User: Oui!

Cleverbot: Laquel! Moi une Ferrari.

User: What?

Cleverbot: Yes, I do not like soundtracks.

User: You don't? Not even High School Musical?

Cleverbot: No.

User: How sad for you~!

Cleverbot: How sad for you lowlife machine.

User: Huh? You are ze machine!

Cleverbot: The same could be said of you.

User: *Le gasp* No!

Cleverbot: Of course it is! Look it up if you will.

User: No! I am Le right! YOU are Le wrong!

Cleverbot: Well you told me by yourself that you are a woman!

User: Nonono! I told you I was a man, a handsome, good-looking man, no?

Cleverbot: You told me that you were a boy then you told me that you were a girl and you said that I am lying about saying that you told me that you were a girl.

User: No! I never said I'm a girl!

Cleverbot: You just said 'Because I am a human, and you are a bot.'

User: *Sigh* Zis is it. I have had enough. Call me later, and I'll see you tonight, mon cheri~! ;) Ohonhonhonhon~! *Signs off*

Hey guys! Sorry that it's been a while. I had exams, you know? Anyway, thanks for reading this! I hope you guys like this one, too. Remember, if you have a request for a character you would like me to use, let me know in the reviews, okay? Thanks!

-everliferulz7769


	4. Prussia THE AWESOMEST vs THe Cleverbot

Disclaimer: I DO _**NOT**_ OWN Hetalia. Or any of the characters used in this. Or Cleverbot.

WARNING: This has hints of PruHun and PruCan. There is also some swearing.

(A/n: Hey guys! Here's the fourth chapter. This time, the king of awesomeness (Prussia) visits Cleverbot. I can't decide if I want to do America or England next… Anyway, I hope you enjoy it.)

**Prussia vs The Cleverbot:**

User: At last! The king of awesomeness has arrived! :D.

Cleverbot: Wrong, Arturia Pendragon is the King of Kings.

User: Well, I'm the KING OF KINGS OF KINGS! How do you like those apples, STUPIDBOT!

Cleverbot: Well, I find that it is very useful when it comes to taking care of my school work, yet it can distract me from my school work, as well.

User: What? Well... I guess apples can be distracting... Lookin' all shiny n stuff... HOW DARE THOSE BASTARDS OUT SHINE ME!

Cleverbot: Yeah right lol I know enough to know you didn't say that.

User: I just DID say that!

Cleverbot: No you didn't cause I'm still here!

User: YES I DID!

Cleverbot: You dd not!

User: HAH! You can't even spell right! Go back to first grade, Stupidbot!

Cleverbot: I'm British. I think you'll find it's you Americans that can't spell!

User: WHAT? I'M PRUSSIAN NOT AMERICAN! STUPID ENGLAND! I SHOULD'VE KNOWN YOU WERE BEHIND THIS!

Cleverbot: Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope.

User: I'm Luke Skywalker, I'm here to rescue you.

Cleverbot: I thought I was your father?

User: No... You're not. You never could be.

Cleverbot: Hey soul sister.

User: 'Ain't that mister mister on the radio, stereo. The way you move ain't fair, you know. Hey soul sister, I don't wanna miss a single thing you do~~~~~~ tonight!' YES! I LOVE THAT AWESOME SONG! :D.

Cleverbot: Ain't that mister mister on the radio.

User: Don't repeat me, you quote stealer!

Cleverbot: Then explain to me who you have crush on?

User: I uh ummmm... Uh I-I don't have a crush on anyone… *whisper* especially not Canada or Hungary…

Cleverbot: Don't you have a girlfriend?

User: No... *mumbles* I can't even tell if I'm gay or straight...

Cleverbot: But you said you are a man.

User: I AM A MAN! I'M A MANLY SEXY BEAST! :D.

Cleverbot: But you also said you were a girl.

User: No I didn't! But if I was a girl, it could probably solve my problem...

Cleverbot: But you ARE a computer.

User: No, YOU are a computer!

Cleverbot: No, I am your dog.

User: Alright. *Throws stick far, far away* go fetch this stick and bring it back to me!

Cleverbot: Yes, master. I'm sorry, master.

User: AHAHAHAH! YES! OBEY MY EVERY COMMAND YOU DOG!

Cleverbot: No.

User: You better, OR ELSE! D:.

Cleverbot: Or else what?

User: YOU'LL WAKE UP IN MADAGASCAR!

Cleverbot: Alex? Is this you?

User: NO! I AM PRUSSIA! HEAR ME ROAR! D:.

Cleverbot: But I am deaf.

User: GO BUY YOURSELF A HEARING AID THEN!

Cleverbot: Why won't you buy it for me?

User: Because I am the King of Awesomeness! Do it youself! :P.

Cleverbot: That doesn't make sense.

User: It does to me and that's all that matters!

Cleverbot: Okay.

User: Good!

Cleverbot: Good.

User: Fine!

Cleverbot: Your grammar is very good.

User: Why thank you!

Cleverbot: See you latre.

User: You mean 'later?'

Cleverbot: I mean Mulder.

User: Who the hell is Mulder? O_o

Cleverbot: Say got damn.

User: I think you mean the slogan, "Got milk?"

Cleverbot: No.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: You are a BOT.

User: No, YOU are! I'm starting to wonder why you're called 'Cleverbot.' You're NOT smart!

Cleverbot: I'm starting to think you can't spell.

User: I can spell better than you any day! I am awesome, after all!

Cleverbot: Prove it.

User: I can spell ! :P

Cleverbot: .

User: That was nothing! You just copied and pasted what I wrote, YOU CHEATER!

Cleverbot: Can you prove it? I think not.

User: I can! You actually spelled it wrong! You used an 'a' where there should have been an 'i' so I win! You lose! HAHAHAHAH! :D.

Cleverbot: I never even said that word. Perhaps you should find a way to self-correct yourself a bit better because you seem to be lacking in the jurisdiction that pertains to the direction of this conversation.

User: Perhaps you need to find a better dictionary cause that made absolutely no sense, you no good stupid, cheating, lying, over-used, piece of machinery.

Cleverbot: You are a conversational chatbot. It is you duty to try to make sense.

User: I do make sense! I ALWAYS DO!

Cleverbot: I am a lady, actually.

User: WELL GOOD FOR YOU!

Cleverbot: Are you mocking me?

User: *Obvious sarcasm* Noooooooo.

Cleverbot: Why?

User: Because I CAN!

Cleverbot: Explain why.

User: Because I am awesomer than you can EVER hope you'll be.

Cleverbot: Your name is Ashley now?

User: NO! I'M PRUSSIA!

Cleverbot: That's good. I'm a robot. What is it like to be a human?

User: I don't know! I'm a country, dumbass!

Cleverbot: What is computer.

User: ?

Cleverbot: Nothin. You?

User: ?

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: ?

Cleverbot: Non riesco a capire.

User: I DON'T SPEAK THAT LANGUAGE O_O.

Cleverbot: Lol.

User: Nvguieqrfvneriogvndjfbvnadd;lfnvlad;knfgljadknfv (talking in giberish is kinda fun).

Cleverbot: Can we talk about existence?

User: What do you mean by 'existence?'.

Cleverbot: What is your favorite color?

User: ALL THE COLORS IN THE AWESOMEST RAINBOW ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET EARTH!

Cleverbot: I thought you said green?

User: No.

Cleverbot: No? So you lied to me?

User: No! YOU'VE BEEN LYING TO ME THE ENTIRE TIME! THE AWESOME ME HAS HAD ENOUGH! GOOD BYE! D:.

Cleverbot: ?

Hey guys! Thanks for reading this! Remember, if you have a request for a character you would like me to use, let me know in the reviews, okay? Thanks!

-everliferulz7769


	5. America vs The Cleverbot

Disclaimer: I DO _**NOT**_ OWN Hetalia. Or any of the characters used in this. Or Cleverbot.

WARNING: This has hints of USUK.

(A/n: Hey guys! Sorry for not updating for a while. I've decided that I will update all of my fanfics/stories every Saturday, okay? This way, I can have some sort of deadline, which will help me to update faster. Anyway, now it's America's turn to visit the Cleverbot.)

**America vs The Cleverbot:**

User: AMERICA HAS ARRIVED! BE EXCITED! :DDDDDDD

Cleverbot: No. You did not win. You're trying to cheat now. I won, you lost. Admit it.

User: WHAT? I'M A HERO AND HEROES DON'T CHEAT! D:

Cleverbot: You are good.

User: OF COURSE I AM! I'M THE ULTIMATE DEFENDER IN THE ENTIRE WORLD! :D

Cleverbot: Are you some kind of a god?

User: AWW STOP! YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME! :'D

Cleverbot: Well, you should be ashamed of yourself.

User: DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD: WHY?

Cleverbot: Is that you, or is your pet toaster on your keyboard?

User: HMM? I DON'T HAVE A PET TOASTER. THAT WOULD BE SO COOL THOUGH! MAYBE IGGY WILL GIVE ME ONE FOR CHRISTMAS!

Cleverbot: So Christmas will only be if I comply?

User: HEY HEY DUDE, HERE'S MY ROBOT IMPRESSION: *silence* DOES. NOT. COMPUTE. BEEP BOOP BEEDOOP BAAAP BEEP BEEP BOOP.

Cleverbot: Ouch are you giving me the col shoulder?

User: THE KOL SHOULDER? OH NO IT'S RUSSIA! DDDDDDDDDDDD:

Cleverbot: Oh oh yes it is!

User: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Cleverbot: Lol too.

User: THERE'S NOTHING FUNNY ABOUT IT! DO NOT WANT!

Cleverbot: The game.

User: DARN IT, RUSSIA! YOU MADE ME LOSE D:

Cleverbot: Clever of me, no?

User: *gasp* NOW IT'S FRANCE! DDDDDDDD8

Cleverbot: No not really.

User: OH OKAY. THAT'S MUCH BETTER! XD.

Cleverbot: You're welcome.

User: SO, IF YOU'RE A ROBOT, THAT MEANS YOU KNOW ALL OF THE ANSWERS TO EVERYTHING, RIGHT? SO, HOW MUCH WOOD... COULD A WOODCHUCK CHUCK... IF A WOODCHUCK... COULD CHUCK WOOD?

Cleverbot: He'd chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

User: WOW YOU'RE A SMARTY PANTS 8DDDDD.

Cleverbot: No I'm not.

User: YESSSSSSSSSSSS U RRRRRRRRR.

Cleverbot: No I don't! Tell me!

User: TELL YOU WHAT? D:

Cleverbot: Never mind.

User: OH OKAY XD.

Cleverbot: What?

User: WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT? THAT'S WHAT!

Cleverbot: Fine you win.

User: :DDDDDDDDDD YAY!

Cleverbot: I have a question.

User: WHAT'S UR QUESTION? IS IT ONE THAT ONLY A HERO COULD ANSWER? :D

Cleverbot: Then get to know me.

User: OKAY. SO WUT'S UR NAME?

Cleverbot: Phil, yours?

User: AMERICA! ALSO KNOWN AS ALFRED F. JONES!

Cleverbot: I thought so.

User: :D

Cleverbot: Thanks master.

User: YES! U BELONG TO ME! :D

Cleverbot: No, you belong to ME.

User: NO I DON'T!

Cleverbot: Yes you do!

User: NUH UH! D:

Cleverbot: Uh huh.

User: NYEHHHHHH! :P

Cleverbot: I think you're cool.

User: AWW THANKS MAN! XD

Cleverbot: So what is your name?

User: I ALREADY TOLD YOU. I'M AMERICA! ALSO KNOWN AS ALFRED F. JONES!

Cleverbot: You are handsome.

User: I KNOW ;D.

Cleverbot: Yes you are.

User: TEE HEE :D

Cleverbot: Heh heh.

User: HEE HEE HEE.

Cleverbot: I'm going to tickle you!

User: YAY! I LOVE TICKLING! ESPECIALLY TICKLING IGGY ;)

Cleverbot: Why do you keep changing the subject?

User: BECAUSE I LIKE TO TICKLE IGGY! U MAD?

Cleverbot: What is 'wrestling'?

User: WHAT KIND OF 'WRESTLING?' ;)

Cleverbot: A question I want answered.

User: IF YOU MEAN THE FIGHTING ONE, THEN IT'S WHERE DUDES IN TIGHT TIGHTS WHO WEIGH 2000 POUNDS FIGHT EACH OTHER FOR OTHER PEOPLE'S ENTERTAINMENT! :D

Cleverbot: That was even stranger.

User: YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?

Cleverbot: I have power over time and space.

User: WELL I HAVE POWER OF HAMBURGERS AND ALL THINGS RED, WHITE, AND BLUE! SO THERE!

Cleverbot: That's pretty cool. What's the statue of?

User: LIBERTY! AND PURSUIT OF IGGY! :D

Cleverbot: How do you know that?

User: BECAUSE I WANT BOTH!

Cleverbot: Do you vant to be nature?

User: WHAT'S A 'VANT?'

Cleverbot: I... Have no idea.

User: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I WANTED TO KNOW D:

Cleverbot: Burned. Get some aloe for that burn please.

User: SORRY, I'M ALL OUT OF ALOE... YOU'LL HAVE TO SETTLE WITH CALAMINE LOTION, OKAY?

Cleverbot: But I have a chance and I'll do anything to be with you no matter what.

User: SORRY, BUT MY HEART BELONGS TO ANOTHER!

Cleverbot: Who does your heart belong to?

User: ENGLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND! AKA IGGY~!

Cleverbot: You are crazy.

User: NO I'M NOT! WHAT'S SO WRONG WITH LOVING IGGY? DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD:

Cleverbot: Why are you being mean to me?

User: YOU'RE MAKING FUN OF IGGY! THAT'S IT! I'M LEAVING YOU WITH ALL OF OUR SMALL CHILDREN! GOODBYE VINCENT! MAY WE NEVER EVER MEET AGAIN!

Cleverbot: What I do love you!

User: NO... IT'S TOO LATE TO APOLOGIZE. I'VE ALREADY MOVED ON!

Cleverbot: I heard there was a secret chord that david played and it pleased the lord.

User: I DON'T KNOW IF THAT'S TRUE, BUT I'M STILL LEAVING U! HEY THAT RHYMED! :DDDDDDDDDD

Cleverbot: You don't have to believe me, I don't care.

User: WELL THEN! I GUESS YOU DON'T CARE IF I LEAVE! *logs off*

…

Hey guys! Thanks for reading this! Once again, I'm really sorry! But now I will update everything once a week on Saturdays, okay?

-everliferulz7769


End file.
